Flatforms

“…she always wears high heels because, according to her, flat shoes are for quitters.”Jack Donaghy (Alec Baldwin) referring to his wife Avery Jessup on 30Rock.

Oh no. That is not a typo. You read correctly…FLATFORMS. Learn that word. Rhymes with platforms. Finally designers have heard and answered my prayers and created a shoe for me. You see, like millions of others, I suffer from a debilitating disease. I am allergic to flats. Oh I have tried to wear them…I know they are sensible, I know they are good for me, I know they are the choice of healthy people everywhere (gee, it sounds like I’m describing brussel sprouts!). I just have not been able to do it. I am height challenged and if it’s not 4 inches plus (102mm for the metrics) it’s not for me.  Enter the flatform. Spring’s beautiful new shoe. Marc Jacobs, Chanel, Derek Lam…they all did a version. Oh how they lift and support…just like a great bra! Prada even did a take on the classic oxford. Be still my heart. I’ll be wearing them for after-school pick up, to soccer games, trips to the dentist; anywhere a sensible girl ought to wear her sensible shoes.

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